Do Not Shrink Yourself
It's time to become someone who might be difficult to work with
Last year I thought I found the leftist queer collective of my dreams with a creative co-op. It turned out to be three sketchy forty-somethings in a trench coat. They were late or absent to most of our meetings and eventually had a total communication breakdown.
In our introduction they played cupid in the same breath as wanting to connect professionally. I ignored the red flags out of desperation to take the next step in my career, something that has almost happened a dozen times since graduating with a film and music degree at the height of the pandemic.
The leftists seemed so promising after the first group I worked with: cis-het men in their early twenties who gave me a bleak reality check about what was expected of me to work in the entertainment industry. I would need to shrink myself and minimize my humanity, something they only seemed to emphasize with the women they worked with.
They continued to call me by my dead name, as though I was asking for too much. I couldn’t help that they were meeting me at a critical point in my transition.
I saw this dynamic repeated when the founder of an advertising agency disintegrated from a mentor-role into something less respectable after I wouldn’t fall in line.
When I was concerned about an opportunity I interviewed for where the job was described by the interviewer as demanding to the point of exploitation, he became irate in the defense of CEOs and their capital. Being exploited is how you climb the ladder to make more money, and people are just weak.
The American-Dream fallacy.
Nobody wants to work anymore. Another of his memorable rants: how all employees should be forced to return to the office, no exceptions. Everyone who says they are more productive at home is full of shit. With a lot more profanities peppered in, because that was always his style.
When an architect offered me minimum wage to be his personal assistant, I countered that I would need him to match my current salary for it to be feasible. He replied that he was hoping the prospect of working for him would be so appealing that I would do it for any price.
Aside from the leftists who I seemed better aligned with despite our incompatibilities, these are examples of beloved, respected mentors from expansive “liberal” (conservative but make it blue) circles of Atlanta.
They are men of all ages who can be traced back to the same club: The Grifter Academy, my friends and I call it. My former employer and her secret husband are also members. A one-dimensional world of hustle and grind and, it’s just business.
Fake it ‘til you make it (to federal prison)
The same academy that trained a certain political leader to do the bidding of its wealthiest executives and investors, raising him from councilman to mr. cop city.
Recently an article came out about a popular business owner, also a friend of the academy, who was experiencing legal repercussions because of how she treated her employees, including stealing their tips and eventually not paying them at all. The comments became flooded with people who reached to defend her, someone they did not know personally, and especially not in a subordinate capacity where true integrity is revealed.
It seemed that these supporters liked the establishment’s food and branding so much that they knew she must be innocent, and the Atlanta Journal Constitution was obviously guilty of defamation. A similar strategy is often used by friends and fans of abusers who deflect and project from victim statements to maintain their status. This allows them to continue with their agenda.
Those who hide behind this facade usually conflate their followers or customers as their community. The illusion is reinforced by their supporters, knowingly or obliviously, who show up in big numbers IRL and virtual to co-sign. There are a variety of incentives, real or prospective, they stand to gain through proximity after all.
If those who lack a moral compass are held accountable, eventually their less obvious associates will be under scrutiny as well. For their continued success in the shadows, the oppressive majority proudly takes on the victim(s) speaking out.
People who resist manipulation and expose the truth are a threat to those who benefit from the cycle of abuse. Seldom challenged due to their status, the person or institution in power will slander and scapegoat those who question their motives. They will say anything to minimize the harm of their impact.
Fascist governments weaponize words such as “liberty” and “safety” to include certain people at the expense of everyone else. This gives them access to unchecked measures of control and surveillance. Order is maintained through restriction and punishment, and accountability is not possible because of the immense weight of their retaliation. The justice system is not broken. It’s operating as programmed.
We are largely taught not to question these absurdities for fear of becoming an outcast. Our basic human need for connection is turned on us unless we play the game.
Calling out patterns from fascist playbooks requires a willingness to sacrifice the “peace” and become increasingly alienated. When we expose how these systems and their foot soldiers are connected, we can strategize our resistance more effectively and inspire courage in others to speak out as well.
We see in real time how quickly information is disseminated, creating a more widespread class consciousness across the workers. Knowledge is power so they ban our apps, burn our books, silence our voices, and smear the headlines with propaganda.
The empire of smoke and mirrors is falling. As the harsh reality of what America has always been across every administration becomes unavoidable (one party with two colors), there are fewer people who will be gullible enough to keep licking boots.
I pray for our strength under the weight of normalized violence and censorship.
I pray for our safety as they make people “disappear” for their beliefs.
I pray for our imagination to see through and beyond the demoralizing measures taken to prevent the advancement of women, trans people, and the global majority of African, Asian, Indigenous, Latin American, and biracial people who make up almost 85% of the world’s population.
I pray for the continued courage to share our stories like daggers to the wheels of the colonial machine.
This is just great!
AMEN!!!!